What I did not realise about ambition

Ambitious.

The Oxford Dictionary defines ambition as having a strong desire and determination to succeed.

Growing up, I wanted others to see how ambitious I was.
I wanted to see myself as ambitious.
It was my identity.

I wasn’t going to be the lazy wasteman floating around with no purpose.
I had a clear aim, and I was willing to do anything to get there.

But what I didn’t realize…
was that my ambition was like stacking a tower of cards—unsteady, destined to come crashing down.

And you know what the funny thing is?
When I did achieve…
I never felt emptier.

I’ve come to understand that being ambitious isn’t just about chasing success.
It’s about being accepted—by others, yes, but most importantly by myself.

And in the past, ambition was the only way I could catch my father’s hollow attention, the only way to feel accepted by him